Every so often, I return to McSweeney’s Lists for a good laugh. Here are some of my favourites of the ones I read today:
SPOILERS I’VE DELIVERED TO ENGLISH LIT MAJORS.
~By Gladstone
Godot never comes.
Bartleby is a lot like humanity in his preferring not to.
Peyton Farquhar sure has an active imagination at Owl Creek.
Your close reading skills and knowledge of symbolism will not be rewarded in your job as a lawyer or coffee barista.
* * *
~By Pravasan Pillay
The Aristhrottle
The Wittgenspine Buster
The Figure Four Ankle Locke
The Reverse Spinning Kickegaard
The Top Rope Over-the-Shoulder Thoreau
The Pulling Down of the Lyotard
The Feuerback Breaker
The Unemployment Clothes Line
* * *
RADIOHEAD AT THE CULINARY INSTITUTE.
~By Jimmy Chen
“Everything in Its Mise en Place”
“Fritter, Happier”
“All I Knead”
“Bones”
“My Waffle-Iron Lung”
“High and Dry Rub”
“Knives Out”
“Caramel Police”
“Black Star Anise”
“Weird Fishes”
“Crepe”
* * *
PALEOLITHIC BRYAN ADAMS: A PLAYLIST.
~By Josiah Lindsey
“Cuts Like a Hand-Sharpened Piece of Flint”
“Run to You Across the Bering Land Bridge”
“Hearts on Fire (Which Few of Us Can Make)”
“(Everything I Do) I Do It for Scavenged Mammoth Meat”
“Summer of 6”
There is more fun over at McSweeney’s Lists.